What I Don't Understand About Men

   Well, a couple of my friends unknowingly chose this topic for my first legitimate blog post.  It is much more lighthearted than some other things I would like to discuss, but it's always good to have some fun.  Men, feel free to explain these things, and women, you can add to the list!

Things I don't Understand About Men:


1.  Channel Surfing
     My dad does this.  If Channel Surfing were an Olympic event, my father would be in London right now.  This man can watch four or five different television programs at one time.  Whenever a commercial pops up, he's off exercising his thumb at a thousand clicks a minute.  He doesn't even pause to see what's on.  He just clicks away.  But he's always back to the correct channel the exact second his program comes back on.  Usually he does this during NASCAR.  It must be a ritual or something.  Even better is when a guy channel surfs through all 500 channels to find something to watch and then settles on a movie he's already seen a thousand times.  Braveheart?  Yes!  And it started an hour ago?  Perfect!

2.  Remotes
     While we're on the subject of television, here's another thing I don't understand about men...  Why on earth would anyone need TWENTY SEVEN remotes for ONE television?  I might be exaggerating slightly, but seriously?  I think our living room television has one remote to turn it on, another to control volume, another that does absolutely nothing, one to change the channel, and another to work the DVD player.  Let's not forget a Wii or PS3 controller to work Netflix.  Men, why do you need all of these?  I just get up and walk to my television.  I think it's much easier to push buttons than to try to remember which remote does what.  Keeping track of all of those remotes and their limited functions must be a great memory exercise.

3.  The Way Men Sit
     You know what I'm talking about: plopped down on the couch, feet spread about two feet apart, body slightly reclined, and hand on the inseam of the pants, just below the zipper.  Why sit like that?  Are you making sure everything is still there?  What's up with this?

4.  Male Bonding
     From my careful observations, unless men go out and actually do something together, the average male get-together involves nothing more than setting on the couch, watching the final hour of Braveheart, and everyone checking facebook on their phones.  What's appealing about that?   "Hey, come over and watch the last half of Braveheart! I finally found the right remote and we can watch it while we all play on our phones and don't talk to each other!"  I don't understand this at all.